Being There...

Your partner is dealing with a stressful time at work, may be dealing with a family crisis, or has even experienced a medical trauma. You might not be able to relate to what they are going through, but it doesn't mean your partner doesn't need your support. How do you provide your partner support?

The best place to start is recognize when your partner might be needing help. Do their moods seem different? Do they seem more irritable, moody or withdrawn? Do they seem to have difficulty maintaining their regular routine? These are all signs they may be struggling with the stress and this is the time to keep the lines of communication open.

Ask your partner what you can do to help. It may be as simple as a hug or some words of encouragement. They may say they need help with the kids or a household chore. It may be that there's nothing they need from you, but the fact you took the time to check in with them and ask how you can be supportive will go a long way! It's the little gestures that mean the most.

Taking Care of Yourself

You take care of your spouse, your children, your pets, your friends, your parents and maybe even extended family, but who is taking care of you? If you're feeling stretched thin, it could be due to the fact you aren't putting in enough time for some self-care. This can result in increased stress, which in turn causes you to get sick, resentful and cause tension amongst those you love.

Think of it this way:

Imagine you are holding onto a basket of marbles. Each marble represents a moment of care to be bestowed onto another. For each act, you give out marbles to the individual who is receiving the benefit of that act. So you make time for your kids, those are marbles being given out. Same to your spouse as you take their dry-cleaning in. Same to your friends, who need a shoulder to cry on. You get the idea. After a while, if you aren't receiving marbles as fast as you give them away, what happens? You run out of marbles to give. This is known as "burnout" or some may say, "I've lost my marbles!"



It is important to make sure you are replenishing your own marbles constantly. Whether it be taking a hot bubble bath, long walks, a trip to the beach or time to read a book on the back porch, indulging in a little "me" time allows you to refill your basket and continue to be the giving person you want to be.